[Dear readers, please know that the scope of this article is huge, and that I am working on expanding this into a full book. Any one of the subtopics presented here could be a book in and of itself. This is meant to be an overview of all of the pieces of this enormous body of work. Stay tuned for the expanded version in book form, and reach out if you are interested in working towards this on a practical level. I have the map, and have been guiding people on the path for the past two years since the full scope was shown to me.]
There is a war on love, sex, and relationships. This war has been going on for a long, long time. The reason is because relationships are one of the greatest vehicles to spiritual liberation that exists for humanity.
Anything with significant potential to heal, awaken, and expand humanity will be attacked, hijacked, and/or eroded by darker forces who seek to keep us enslaved, stuck, and in the lower realms. This can be seen in many other arenas as well - religion, medicine, schooling, and so many more.
Humanity is at the evolutionary point in our collective journey to step into truly conscious relationships, which means that we can clearly see the potential that exists within relationships for healing, growth, and evolution, and we have the tools to engage in relationships in this way.
We understand that relationships are mirrors. We know the foundations of relationship psychology to grasp that relational wounds can be traced back to childhood, and can only be healed in the context of relationships. We see that secure attachment provides a strong and solid base for us to expand courageously into our fullest potential in this lifetime. And, we have an insatiable desire to clear the relational template to prepare for this higher octave of relating, because we understand it is a God-given mission for us to be the wayshowers of this new paradigm.
[Note: in this article, I use the word God, my word for the higher power, the Divine. I am not religious. If this word triggers you, you can replace it with Spirit, the Universe, etc. While I have been able to reclaim this word on my own terms, I know that religious trauma causes some people to reject this word. If this is you, please stay with me.]
All of this - and so much more - is available to us when we begin to see that relationships bring up all of our ‘stuff’ for a reason, and that we must turn towards the things that get stirred up in relationship with love, compassion, and curiosity.
When our partner can also do that alongside us - when they understand that a trigger is not a ‘bad’ thing, but simply an indicator that something inside of us still needs healing, it is a complete game changer. Conflict turns into an opportunity for deep healing, intimacy, and care. Personal responsibility gets a chance to really shine. Taking ownership of our ‘stuff’ that bleeds into relationships, and showing our partner that we are taking actionable steps to heal provides safety, security, and devotion to the relational container.
The opposite of this is when we unconsciously spew our projections all over one another, demanding that the other tip-toe around our ‘triggers,’ and falling prey to placing our partners on a pedestal (turning them into our higher power, an delusional act of codependent, anti-God programming).
We gain our self-worth from other people rather than generating it from within, or simply accepting that we are a child of God (a divine instrument). And we become addicted to love and relationships to fill a gaping void inside of us, that void filled with self-hatred programming so commonplace in our world today.
Relationships have primarily turned into a realm of pain and suffering: the hell-realms. It is an understatement to say that we are living in the dark ages when it comes to love, sex, and relationships. If this isn’t clear to you in this moment, it will become clear to you when I outline all the parts of the war on love, sex, and relationships in part two below.
As someone who has personally experienced the power of relationships, and is devoted to teaching others how to heal and use them to grow, it pains me to see humanity swimming in the complete inversion of what is available to us.
We are missing the mark, and being directed into an unending cycle of misery and suffering - UNTIL we wake up and learn how to do relationships very differently.
In this article, I will first outline the Path to Divine Union so that you can: 1) better understand why we are only scratching the surface in relationships, and 2) clearly see why there is a war that is leading us in the opposite direction.
Then, I will outline some of the tools being used in this spiritual war and how it is unfolding in our everyday world on a practical level.
Knowledge is power, and seeing the world with clear eyes allows you to become conscious of the game so that you can make different choices, starting now.
Pay attention to all of the resources that I provide to you in this article, as they are the way out, in addition to working with a professional for deep healing and expanded capacity in relationships.
Truth is love, and love is truth.
[Just a quick note to readers: this body of work came through to me in January 2022 after the painful ending of a serious relationship. Up until that point, I had been teaching about the ‘love and light’ side of relationships. I had already tapped into the vast potential of using relationships as an evolutionary vehicle, was working with clients to heal relational wounds, and had been teaching about conscious relationships. The ending of that relationship included a very dark aspect that was revealed to me. This lifted the veil and forced me to see the dark side of it all, which I call the war on love, sex, and relationships.
Although it was an extremely intense time for me personally, it all happened for a reason to show me this body of work and give me the lived experience of facing the darkness head on. That particular relationship also gave me important keys that expanded my work tremendously, and so admittedly, parts of it were good and true.
Since that time, I have spoken about the war on love, sex, and relationships over the past two years on the podcast, Telegram, Instagram, and here in my writing. However, this is the first time I am compiling all of the information that I have in one place, in an organized and hopefully easily digestible way.]
The first step in understanding this work is to see how relationships are a path of spiritual development. This is multilayered, and correlates to Carl Jung’s path of individuation.
THE PATH TO DIVINE UNION
The way that I conceptualize relationships and the path to divine union is a three part journey.
LEVEL ONE
The first level is what I call The Foundation. This includes a strong and solid base of secure attachment, healthy relationship skills, understanding of boundaries, and true self-love.
This is absolutely required to be able to ascend into the higher levels of relationship. Without it, everything else will collapse.
I have worked with several spiritually advanced individuals that were seemingly at much higher levels. However, because they did not have a strong and solid foundation, their relationships were not in good shape. We had to go back to the basics in order to fill in the gaps.
In this journey, we can’t skip steps. It is not necessarily a linear path, and everything unfolds as it’s meant to, but ultimately the base needs to be strong and healthy to ‘hold’ the higher octaves of relationship.
In order to build this foundation, you must work with a professional in order to heal relational wounds and patterns, develop healthy self-love, deprogram from codependency, understand and implement boundaries, and learn healthy relationship skills. There is no substitute for this deep inner work with a therapist.
However, I’m including some key resources below that get you started.
Level One Resources:
Know your current attachment style. The four types of attachment styles are Secure, Anxious, Avoidant, and Disorganized.
I say ‘current,’ because we know that everyone can move towards secure attachment. With targeted support, you can move into secure attachment in about 6 months on average (depending on your personal history and trauma).
You can (and should) prioritize secure attachment as your north star in relationships. Without true secure attachment, you will not be able to ascend into the higher levels of relationship and be able to ‘hold’ them.
Take this short assessment to measure where you are at. If you need help interpreting it, please send me a screenshot.
The language they use in this assessment is a little different - 'preoccupied' means anxious, 'dismissing' means avoidant, and 'fearful-avoidant' means disorganized. The bottom left quadrant indicates secure attachment. I use this as pre/post measure to gauge progress with clients.
I have a teaching video here to dive into attachment styles.Read the book Attached if you need a basic understanding of attachment styles. It can provide starting guidance on how to move towards secure attachment and how to relate to others who have different styles of attachment. However, I’ll say again that there is no replacement for therapy if you need to move into secure attachment. Please do not bypass this part.
Personally, I have moved from disorganized attachment into secure attachment through intensive therapy and spiritual work (in addition to putting everything into practice IN relationships.) Although it is true that disorganized attachment is the hardest to heal since it is the result of significant trauma, it is possible!Clearly understand codependency. This is a requirement, because 95% of the world is operating under this dysfunctional dynamic. I have not met a person who hasn’t been influenced by codependency programming. This is NOT love, although we have been trained to believe that it is. Watch my teaching video here and see how it encapsulates the work that is required around self-love, boundaries, and secure attachment.
Read the book Conscious Loving. There is no other relationship book that I recommend more highly than this one. Although it introduces you to the concept of conscious relationships (moving into Level Two, next), in terms of learning and using healthy relationship skills, it really covers everything.
LEVEL TWO
This is when we move into Conscious Relationships.
Conscious relationships are when we understand that relationships are here for a reason: so we can use them as a mirror for healing and growth.
There are certain things that we can only see about ourselves when we relate with others; in other words, relationships show us our blind spots.
Everybody knows that all of our ‘stuff’ comes up in relationships. And I believe that this is by design. Our ‘triggers’ and ‘baggage’ that come up are pure gold, as all of it shows us what we still need to heal internally.
However, we have been taught that this is a bad thing, that this is something we need to run away from. Just sweep it all under the rug.
Or, we have been taught that it’s our partner’s fault, so we blame them and avoid taking personal responsibility. This keeps us enslaved in the drama triangle, one of the most disempowering dynamics that exists within human relations. [More on this later.]
Neither of these approaches are the solution, and if we keep choosing either of these paths, we will keep cycling until we face the truth. Or, God will shake us HARD to wake up.
The courage to turn towards your shadow to see what is there with clear eyes, and to own it is the only way forward. This is natural law.
There are many facets to ‘how’ to practice conscious relationships, and I speak about many of the skills required here.
However, the main idea of conscious relationships is the understanding that relationships are a vehicle to make the unconscious conscious, to make what is running underneath the surface come up into our awareness, and that this is by design.
Why do we want to do this? Because our unconscious is what’s really running the show in our life, and it’s comprised of unhealed trauma, programming, and conditioning - things that prevent us from living our lives in the most effective and authentic way possible.
Most people who come to me are stuck in unconscious patterns from childhood trauma, and they are NOT happy with the way their relationships (or lives) are going.
Doing the work to make the unconscious conscious so that we can heal the wounds and live healthier lives is absolutely essential to liberating our fullest potential, as well as breaking dysfunctional relationship patterns that have caused pain and suffering in our ancestral lines for generations. This work is worth every minute and every ounce of energy spent towards it.
Therefore, compassionately turning towards the stuff in our unconscious that gets stirred up in our relationships, and doing the necessary shadow work to heal and grow IS the definition of conscious relating. This is the most important thing, and you choose to approach the day to day practice of it is up to you.
However, there are certain things that I have seen really help people on the path of conscious relationships. Truth telling, personal responsibility, an understanding that relationships are co-created, and growth mentality are all aspects that I have found essential. I go deeper in this short podcast episode here.
Engaging in shadow work through the practice of conscious relationships is a powerful way to raise our level of consciousness, and this is how we truly ‘raise our vibration’ on a more permanent level.
And best of all, the day to day ‘material’ of relationships (what gets stirred up) is available to everyone, for free! I often say that practicing relationships consciously is more catalytic than any workshop or coach. And once you understand how to work with relationships consciously (growth mentality is required!) and then start to practice them in your day to day life, the sky is the limit.
It is important to note that you can (and should) practice conscious relationships in ALL of your relationships, not just romantic ones. Relationships with friends, family, coworkers, and especially our children are all fertile ground for working with relationships consciously.
Yet, almost nobody is doing this. Many of the barriers that I have already mentioned (the ‘tools’ of the war on love, sex, and relationships that I will expand on below) stand in the way of most people truly practicing relationships consciously.
And yet you, by way of reading this article, may be one of the individuals that can break through to this higher level of understanding and serve as a way shower for others. More models of how to actually do this are desperately needed in these times. This is not small work.
Once we do a certain amount of relational shadow work, using the material that comes up in relationships for healing, we can begin to move into a more regulated relational container where the only limit to growth and expansion is what Gay Hendricks calls the ‘upper limit problem’ [in his books Conscious Loving and The Big Leap.]
The upper limit problem is when we sabotage the relationship because it’s just too good. Internally, we don’t believe that we are worthy of having a healthy relationship, and/or we are so used to dysfunction that our nervous system can’t handle being regulated. So we create problems where there aren’t any. We self-sabotage.
It’s very common, so we must build tolerance for the good in order to transcend the upper limit problem. I do this with people through nervous system expansion and breathwork. My teacher calls it ‘anchoring in the good.’ From this place, anything is possible.
While it is true that shadow work will likely continue until our last day, there are a certain amount of weeds that you can pull from the garden in order to clear space for the fruit.
So in other words, you don’t have to be fully healed in order to experience major expansion in your relationships. Space for this becomes available after you wade through some of the muck first. And, this helps you pop up and out of the glass ceiling (upper limit problem) in order to experience major leaps (getting a taste of you and your partner at your highest.)
I have experienced this in relationship, and the amount of expansion that is possible is profound. So have faith, and trust that evolutionary pull to these kinds of relationships!
Again, the massive potential for growth + evolution on this path is a primary reason why relationships are under attack.
As Robert Johnson says in his book WE, “Romantic love is a necessary ingredient in the evolution of the Western psyche. We will achieve wholeness and will move on to the next step in our evolution of consciousness only when we learn to live consciously with romantic love - that is, with the vast psychological forces that it represents. In the evolution of consciousness, our greatest problem is always our richest opportunity. The human psyche always strives towards wholeness, strives to complete itself and become more conscious. The unconscious mind seeks to move its contents up to the level of consciousness, where they can be actualized and assimilated into a more complete conscious personality. Each person’s psyche has an inborn evolutional urge to grow, to integrate the contents of the unconscious, to bring together all of the missing parts of the total individual into a complete, whole, and conscious self.”
Again, this is natural law. Which means that whether you know it or not, the forces of divine will are at play in the background, nudging us to evolve in this way.
Once you understand this, your life will make a lot more sense. It took me 40+ years to be able to understand that everything in my life has happened for a reason, to pull myself out of victim mentality. To turn shit into gold. To embrace that cycle of death and rebirth x 100. This is alchemy, and this is required for Level Two. Otherwise, you do not have the fuel to propel yourself forward on the path of spiritual evolution. You stay stuck and stagnant, spinning out in dysfunctional patterns and codependency programming.
We will look at many of the other barriers in the second half of this article.
Practicing conscious relationships is something that can be done now, today, starting one step at a time. You don’t have to be perfect at it, in fact, practicing relationships this way can be messy - because you’re inviting all of your ‘stuff’ to come up, and to face it all with love! AND, doing this with another person and all of their stuff.
Again, almost nobody is practicing relationships this way, and yet it is a huge key to our collective healing and evolution.
Reach out if you need support with conscious relationships. Additionally, here are some resources to assist you.
Level Two Resources:
My most downloaded podcast episode is a 20 minute overview of what conscious relationships are and how you can start practicing them today.
Robert Augustus Masters wrote a great book called Bringing Your Shadow Out of the Dark that helps.
Lynne Forrest’s article on the drama triangle is a confronting but necessary primer on how we are collectively stuck in the victim-persecutor-rescuer trap. Her powerful article shows how we can become more conscious of our roles and step off the drama triangle forever. This is required reading for my clients. I truly believe that humanity must transcend this dynamic in order to evolve into the next level. This dynamic is responsible for violence, wars, and so much human suffering, and yet is totally unnecessary and can be interrupted by personal responsibility.
Again, another shout out for Conscious Loving as the bible for how to practice conscious relationships. This is one that I come back to time and time again, and I highly recommend it to all of my clients.
LEVEL THREE
The final stage is Divine Union. By definition, divine union is union with the divine. It is the unification of the God-self and the human-self. The divine in human form. The full embodiment of the soul. The ultimate surrender to the bigger thing. Submitting the ego to God’s will. Heaven on earth.
Many people misuse and misunderstand the term divine union, using it to refer to a romantic relationship. While it is true that using relationships consciously as a path to spiritual enlightenment is a vehicle to get to divine union, we must remember that divine union is union with God, not another person.
[Truthfully, many relationships that people call ‘divine union’ don’t look very sacred. They look like toxic ‘twin flame’ codependency traps and/or Dark Side of Cupid relationships. And so, even this term ‘divine union’ has been hijacked and twisted to mean something that it is not, which creates confusion, watering down the true meaning of it. True divine union is the ultimate goal of many spiritual paths and teachings, and should not be used frivolously.]
This third level of divine union stands on top of the two prior stages.
The way I conceptualize the path towards divine union through the vehicle of relationships is by way of Carl Jung’s path of individuation.
His model is essentially the roadmap on how to get there, because his concept of individuation is another way of saying divine union - it is an individual who has walked the path of peeling back the layers of the false self to embody the True Self, which is essentially our higher self. This is us as humans, embodying our authentic, divine nature, here on earth.
If you aren’t familiar with Jung’s path of individuation, here is a basic level of understanding.
First, there is recognition of our persona - the mask that we wear in the world, the part of us that has been conditioned by the external world that is not actually our true self. This leads us to shadow work, which is actually our search to find who we truly are beneath all of the layers.
Part of shadow work - whether we know it or not - is asking ourselves, why do I wear these masks? What caused me to abandon parts of myself in the first place? Usually, the answer is because of trauma and conditioning.
I began to talk about shadow work above in level two, because that’s when it starts to occur consciously and with intention. However, it’s worthwhile to discuss it here, too, so you can understand how it fits in to the path to divine union, or union with God, and why there is a reason for these progressive stages.
Shadow work is making our unconscious (what’s running beneath the surface) conscious through healing trauma, deprogramming ourselves, and becoming more whole and integrated. This concept has become more well known over the past few years, which is a wonderful thing.
Shadow work is best done with a professional, because (by definition) we cannot see the deeper layers of our unconscious unless another person shows us our blind spots.
After a period of shadow work in Jung’s path of individuation, the last stop before unmasking the True Self is anima/animus integration.
This is the recognition that we all have ‘the other’ inside of us; women have an inner masculine and men have an inner feminine. And when we attain wholeness internally, by integrating and welcoming ‘the other,’ we become whole and complete, and therefore, content. We reach a point where we are not grasping externally to fill a void inside of ourselves. We know that we are enough, and don’t need another person to ‘complete’ us.
As Rupi Kaur says, “I do not want to have you to fill the empty parts of me. I want to be full on my own, I want to be so complete I could light a whole city. And then I want to have you, ‘cause the two of us combined could set it on fire.”
If you want to understand anima/animus integration on a more practical level, learn more here for men and here for women.
The anima (inner feminine) and animus (inner masculine) also relate to the popularized masculine/feminine polarity teachings, and I work with these energies very consciously in my own life and with clients to integrate both internally (inner union).
This is essentially the path to wholeness, or becoming an integrated human. You will see it referred to as a balance of the head and the heart, or yin and yang, right brain and left brain…there are countless ways we refer to inner balance.
I have a lot to say about popular polarity teachings from spending time in the polarity scene in Los Angeles years ago, and I’ll touch upon that more below when I get into some of the things being used to lead us astray. I also spoke more about it here.
What I will say, though, is that it is essential to work with the feminine and masculine energies as polarities, but moving towards integration internally. Many people are speaking about this now, the idea that inner union is a prerequisite for meeting your divine counterpart in a romantic relationship. I absolutely agree that once we feel more whole and content internally, rather than seek externally to fill a void inside of us (codependency), we attract partners who are a much healthier fit for us.
There is a spiritual reason why - it’s a little advanced to get into here, but both people are closer to God via inner union - but even just on a psychological level, it equates to both people having secure attachment. Listen to my teaching video on codependency here for a more in-depth explanation.
Each of the three stages are vast landscapes, and to give them full explanation is beyond the scope of this article. However, I will be expanding all sections of this article in the forthcoming book.
Additionally, if you are called to go deeper now and feel that you are ready, I mentor people in my program The Wayshowers. This provides a description of some of the ‘work’ involved in walking the path, and includes many resources and reading materials for you to explore.
My two Substack articles that relate to Stage Three in particular are:
Alchemy, Divine Union, and Spiritual Enlightenment
Towards Sexual Sovereignty: The Alchemical Purification Process of Human Sexuality
To wrap up level three, which is a profound domain of work that is difficult to distill into a short section, I just want to share that I believe that we are all being nudged down the path of divine union, or union with God, whether you know it or not.
Watching collective patterns on a zoomed out level over my lifetime, and putting the pieces together through my study of esoteric spirituality and the work of Jung, among others, I believe in the internal evolutionary impulse that is driving all of us down the path of individuation (divine union).
There is a reason shadow work is now so widespread, we are collectively ready for it.
And there is another reason we see major interest in feminine and masculine energy, it’s the internal drive towards anima/animus integration.
Most people are not conscious of how all of this fits in to the bigger thing, but I am, and it’s thrilling to see. Although we are facing dark times, it is collective shadow work unfolding before our eyes - and I have faith that we will be able to come up and out of it to step into the next level of humanity.
However, there are many, many dark forces at play that seek to prevent us from doing so. This is where we transition into the war on love, sex, and relationships.
THE WAR ON LOVE, SEX + RELATIONSHIPS
Okay, so here we go! This is where I hope you can see why it was necessary for me to paint the picture of just how important relationships are to humans in order for us to heal, grow, and evolve. It is necessary to make a strong case for the REASON why they are being interfered with.
I cannot state enough how strong the technology of human relationships (and within that, human sexuality) is, by design, as an evolutionary force for all of us. And I can promise you that once you start walking the path and actually reaping the benefits of practicing relationships consciously, and working with masculine and feminine energy consciously for inner union, your eyes will open to a whole new paradigm of relationships. The potential is massive, and you must have lived experience in order to understand this beyond an intellectual level.
And I often joke with clients that once your eyes open and you start to walk down this path, you cannot go back.
There is no going back to the old way of unconscious relating, it just doesn’t happen, for the most part. Sure, there are days when we may not have the energy to be ‘conscious’ or feel like putting in the work. But overall, the mindset shift that happens is permanent.
And sometimes people do feel the sting of this, because most people are NOT practicing relationships consciously. So, it can feel like a lonely path sometimes. It feels like we have to get everyone else up to speed. It can be frustrating. Trust me, I know!
AND, there is part of this that is just simply embedded in why you are here. There are a certain percentage of us that are the way showers. We have to go first. It is what it is on a soul level. If you told me in my 20’s that I would be doing this work, I would have thought you were absolutely crazy. I would have wanted no part of it. There are many days where my ego would prefer to stay in my cave and read books and veg out. However, I have learned that I am here to answer to God. It is not about me and my personal preferences. My life has been a series of tough lessons that have happened for a reason. And it’s this way for so many of us - we are the wounded healers. If this resonates with you, I know that you know what I’m saying.
And so to start this section on the war on love, sex, and relationships, the first thing I want to say to you is that this path is not easy. You may be tempted to throw in the towel. These are NOT consensus reality relationships. You will feel like you don’t fit in. You will feel like people don’t get you. You will feel like dating is a joke (because most people will not be a match for you.) This is the foundation of putting your ego to the side to show up to your life and your relationships with a higher purpose, a deeper knowing. To be led by your heart and by God above all else. It’s God’s will, always. We can’t escape that, although we may try. Truth always wins. I had to learn that the hard way. Often we do, because it’s the rare person who submits to God’s will without some kind of crisis, dark night of the soul, or other catastrophe.
I often wonder if this is a requirement for awakening.
One of my favorite quotes by Patricia Joundry applies: “On the way, there will be suffering. It will be outgrown. The masters affirm that we evolve through suffering until we learn to evolve through joy.”
Falling into victim mentality here is very common. I work with people so often who feel the call to walk this path, but they are tearing their hair out for a variety of reasons. They may honestly feel like a slave to their unconscious programming, and want to give up on healing. Or, they may have ‘done the work’ and are ready for relationship, but ask me, “Where are all the conscious men?” (This is not to say that only women are ready for this path, it’s not true - although women are going first, for the most part. I talk about why here.)
So, the first enemy that you need to know about is that part of you that wants to fit in, or have it be easy, or isn’t willing to take risks. Conscious relationships ARE risky, because they are the opposite of sweeping things under the rug. They require absolute trust in your life, and by extension, in God. You have a deeper dedication to your soul’s evolution than you do to being liked, or even staying in a relationship (if it’s not a match for you anymore!)
This is very challenging, especially for people with anxious attachment, codependency programming, people pleasing tendencies, etc. This is why I stated earlier that addressing the codependency aspect is critical for a strong and solid foundation to stand on. So, start there if you need to.
And above all else, you trust your life and the higher divine plan. If you are truly here for conscious relationship and divine union, it will happen. Learning to trust and surrender, realizing that you don’t actually have control over the timing, is HUGE work for so many of us.
This is often the final frontier before finally breaking through to undying devotion to God’s will and trusting the process. This is the answer to almost everything. Because the idea of leading you astray from God’s will for you and your life IS part of the bigger agenda. It’s the difference between the service to self (STS) and the service to others (STO) paths.
And now we get into the multitude of other tools being used by the matrix control system to interfere with healthy, happy relationships. This is a major rabbit hole.
Thankfully for me, I was not new to the idea of the matrix control system. Somebody handed me the classic book by William Cooper Behold a Pale Horse when I was a teenager, and my first boyfriend was an anarchist (my animus, ha!)
Truth be told, I did not stay in that world deeply as some people do, but it’s always been part of my awareness. So when I began to put all of the pieces together after coming face to face with dark energies during the ending of that relationship in 2022, I was actually able to make sense of everything and digest it in a much easier way.
Otherwise, I might have been completely taken out by what happened. This is because it was a ‘dark side of cupid’ relationship, as confirmed by Eve Lorgen during our private work together. And so it involved dark forces.
Eve’s work led me to Bernhard Guenther’s work via this panel discussion, and by extension, his wife Laura Matsue. Fast forward a year, and they invited me to be a guest teacher for them in their Embodied Soul Awakening group program (highly recommend!) It’s such an honor to teach alongside them, their people are my people.
My teacher and mentor David Elliott was also crucial in helping me to clear my energetic field through breathwork and entity removal, and I am eternally grateful.
Understanding how to work on the energetic level of clearing, in addition to helping others to heal the trauma (‘entry points’) was a huge missing piece in my personal life and my work with clients, and now I feel much more equipped to tackle things holistically with people. Without getting into major detail, we were able to trace it back to my original wounding around the sexual abuse energy that I experienced in childhood. This is unfortunately so common for people, especially those who then struggle with love and sex addictions later in life.
It’s been a wild ride, but I am so incredibly grateful for it all.
Moving on, here are the big pieces to the war on love, sex, and relationships:
Media/Movies/Music/Television/Etc.
Technology - texting, dating apps, AI, virtual reality, video games, etc.
Pornography
Prostitution/Sex Work
Child + Human Trafficking
Dark sexual abuse energy/pedophile programming
Trauma based mind control and propaganda
Promiscuity programming/hookup culture
The open relationship/polyamory trend
Distorted masculine/feminine polarity teachings
False/toxic twin flame teachings
Dark Side of Cupid/Love Bite relationships
The Control Game - any manifestation of victim/victimizer, dominant/submissive, etc. that exists in society, including BDSM
Moral relativism (anything goes)
Massive biological sex and gender confusion (trans agenda)
Intentional depolarization of men + women
Poisoned food and water supply (altering hormones)
Addictions - controlling people via drugs, alcohol, sex, food, etc.
Plant medicine - unless the container is extraordinarily held by a facilitator knowledgeable about dark forces and the creation of ‘entry points’ and openings via plant medicine expansion, it is a feeding ground for dark entities.
Neo-Feminism - hijacked version of organic feminism
Codependency Programming (and any trauma/disruption to secure attachment.)
Self-hatred programming (anything that erodes healthy self-love)
Planned Parenthood, birth control, interference with healthy human reproduction
There are more, and I would love to hear from you on what you might add.
Once you become awake and aware of the agenda to erode healthy relationships (in particular, relationships between men + women), you will begin to see it everywhere.
Ultimately, the matrix control system manifests in our 3D world, but it is not of this world. This is where we get into the hyperdimensional matrix and occult forces, because it is way bigger than just humans participating on the earth plane.
Although I will be expanding on this in the book, for the sake of time I will point you to Bernhard Guenther’s work, which is an excellent deep dive into this domain.
[Side note: I teach about conscious relationships with Bernhard and his wife Laura Matsue, and they are both genuinely awesome individuals.]
Over the next few weeks, I will be expanding on all of these individual categories. I will continue to edit and add to this article/page so it is all in one place (and of course, I’m expanding all of this into book form).
I have already spent countless hours writing all of this out, so I’m going to publish this and take a breather. There is already SO MUCH HERE for you to digest and work with; however, I still intend to make this a comprehensive guide to the whole thing. So, stay tuned.
And if you made it this far, you are a rare breed. I heard Charles Eisenstein say recently that he had lost faith in the idea of ever writing another book again, in our culture where quick hits of content have eroded our attention spans to the point where nobody reads anymore.
And while that may be true to an extent, my work is not for the masses. It’s for the rare breed. And so part of me knows that I won’t be reaching my people via 30 second reels. That’s all good with me.
And Charles did receive his divine inspiration for his next book, which he will be focusing on writing now. He said something beautiful about it, about how he needs to ‘become the man who can write this book.’ I can relate to that wholeheartedly, because I feel the same process has been happening to me over the past two years since I was shown this whole thing. I am becoming the woman who can write this book. I have been internally alchemizing all of it, digesting all of it on top of my own personal lessons in relationships, that spiritual warrior mentality. I can face it now with a strength I did not possess two years ago. I have developed courage I thought I would never have.
And simultaneously, the world has never been more ready for this kind of information. People are literally craving this roadmap, and the blocks that are in the way. I know because I get messages every day from people encouraging me to keep going, keep posting, keep writing, keep speaking. If you are one of those people, thank you. I appreciate you more than you know. You are the trailblazers. You are the ones who will be ushering in this new paradigm of human relationships. You are the ones who are breaking generational patterns and curses. You are the ones who will show your children the way to spiritual liberation and higher love.
Love you all + more soon…
Leigh-Anne
Leigh-Anne LoPinto is a psychologist, relationship coach, and breathwork teacher with 12+ years of experience. She works with people all over the world to heal relationship wounds, develop healthy self-love, and attract incredible relationships. She specializes in conscious relationships and divine union, using relationships to evolve on a soul level.
Learn more about The Wayshowers mentorship here.
Such a beautifully comprehensive article that I wish many others might read. Thank you! I love your approach to this important work and share with you your consternation about living in the dark ages when it comes to love, sex, and relationships. The hell-realms, indeed. There's so much to reflect upon.
Being in partnership with a significant other is perhaps the most difficult spiritual path one can undertake. For better or worse, the union between men and women has become less about duty, sacrifice, and procreation, and more of an intensely focused wrestling match with our angels and demons. Yet with this challenge there lies an opportunity to see the path of intimacy as a sacred path.
As you are clearly familiar with, we bring to a relationship all the conditioned aspects of our nature that have not yet been integrated—our worries and concerns, likes and dislikes, and a slew of personal needs. Love is a spiritual path precisely because it reveals both the angels and the demons of our nature. Our hearts seem to expand and burst upon the world, only to fall earthward in a death spiral.
Yet we don’t have to crash and burn.
An essential attribute of a conscious relationship is, I believe, to allow both lovers to be the aegis of each other’s shadow aspects. Their role is neither to sit in judgment nor ignore, enable, condone, or mollify. They are an empathizer who holds in sacred trust the wounds of their lover and tends them with gentle medicine, without allowing their beloved to bypass their own inner work. As emotionally charged as some moments might be, each person is at peace with what arises.
The world that awaits us, then, is revealed by men and women coming into their divine essences. It’s the product of men and women in their divine aspects arising to their full potential.